


Measuring Stick

by Evil_Little_Dog



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Community: comment_fic, Pre-Canon, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 03:46:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3635415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evil_Little_Dog/pseuds/Evil_Little_Dog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: Roy’s been challenged. Maes wonders if he’s up to it. <br/>Disclaimer: This is all Arakawa’s world/characters/etc. I just play here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Measuring Stick

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mangacrack](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mangacrack/gifts).



Roy Mustang returned to the table, his expression reminding Maes of a rabbit's in a jack light. Peering past his friend to eye the statuesque blonde sitting at the bar, he asked, "She shot you down?" 

Roy blinked a couple of times, putting obvious effort into focusing on Maes. He wondered just how much booze Roy had drank, on his little trip to the bar. "It's almost surgical the way she shot me down." His eyebrows dipped down, and the corner of his mouth twitched up. Roy's 'cocky smile', the one he thought might get him anything, or away with anything. "I think she likes me." 

Maes peered past his friend again, seeing a single blue eye staring back at him. The way that eye narrowed and the mouth curled made Maes push back in his chair. "Wow. That's a helluva woman." He turned his attention to Roy. "Are you sure she doesn't have a bigger dick than you?" 

With a brush at his shoulder and an adjustment of his collar, Roy had returned to his overbearing, obnoxious self. "I'm planning on doing whatever I can to find out." 

Picking up his mug, Maes saluted him. "You are about to die, you know." 

Roy smiled wickedly as the blonde slid off her chair, sauntering over to the table. She laid a hand on Roy's shoulder, running it up over the top of his head to tug at his hair. "You're coming with me," she said in a low, dark, smoky voice, two ice blue eyes fixed on Maes, like a pair of steel daggers. He smiled sickly back, trying to keep from shrinking down in his chair. And failing. 

Her mouth pursed. "You. You come, too." And she walked off, Roy stumbling to his feet after her. 

Maes looked at his mug, and after his friend. And after the woman, with her blond hair twitching just above her butt. "Oh, what the hell." Draining the mug, he tossed some sens on the table for a tip and dashed after. There was no way he was missing finding out if the woman did have a bigger dick than Roy.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: _any, any, Is her dick bigger than yours?_


End file.
